5.30.2009

Human vs Roach

First off...I can't stand roaches...especially the big ones that FLY...I will freak out & practically walk a 10 mile radius around them if at all possible...I will not try to kill them because I don't like the crunchy sound it makes...just thinking about it, I can feel the hair on the back of my neck standing on end...

YUCK!

No matter how clean your house is, every now & then, the occasional roach will get into the house...except it wasn't my house...it was a friend's...it was a casual social gathering...we were in the kitchen & she saw one crawling across the floor...she stopped dead in her tracks...I looked at her like she was a little crazy, until I followed her gaze to the floor...& there...was one of the biggest...brownest...creepiest roaches I had ever seen.

Her mouth opened to scream...& almost in competition, the roach opened it's wings, as if to mimick my friend & her gaping mouth...kind of like two animals squaring off in the wild...trying to see who will fold first.

My friend grabbed her Swiffer Wet Jet & stamped it on the roach...*CRUNCH*...I just stood there...not wanting to move...my past experiences with these nasty things is that they are strong...although ridiculous, I was waiting to see if that roach would show it's Superman strength, & lift the Swiffer off his body.

Naturally that did not happen...but we were both standing there...unsure of what to do...I almost thought of abandoning ship...leaving her there, standing with the mop in hand...as she had nothing to prop it against...I didn't leave her...as tempting as it was...

Instead, she said she heard that ordinary household cleaner will kill them...so I went to fetch her can under her bathroom sink...I gave her the can & took hold of the Swiffer handle...she crouched down & told me to slowly...slowly...move the mop off of the perpetrator...I took it off & she immediately sprayed the cleaner...& sprayed...& sprayed...
For a moment, we stood there...staring as it remained still...then...it spread it's wings again...& we both freaked out, screaming & jumping...she sprayed some more...& she actually used up the entire can...but it worked...I don't know if the cleaner was what actually killed it, or if it was death by drowning...but, it worked...& that's all that mattered, because I don't know what we would have done had it spread its wings & chased after us...

Needless to say, the men...who should've been in there to dispose of the pesky thing in the first place, only came in the end...as we were scooping up the corpse with 3 foot long cardboard & heading toward the bathroom, to give it a burial at sea...

We went back to the party, grabbed a beer, & toasted to our success...as ridiculous as our fear of roaches are...even though we know we are a million times bigger than them...in the end, woman triumphed...& now I know, when in need, a whole can of bathroom cleaner will do the trick...

Posted by Just Me at 11:01 PM  

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